Lately, (for obvious reasons) I've been thinking a lot about marriage. Taking on the role of "wife" is both exciting and daunting. I believe the job will require a kind of investment and selflessness that I can't even imagine through my lens of singleness. I've been thinking about the kinds of things our culture and media say about love and marriage and the kinds of things our God tells us about marriage. Instead of being wrapped up in butterflies and happily ever afters, I'm trying to focus my eyes tightly on Jesus and walk hand in hand with Him. I have been coming to a new understanding of covenant and commitment and grace and action.

There is a marriage prayer by Dr. Louis H. Evans that my dad had adapted and read at every wedding he preformed. In fact, he and my mom used pieces of it in their vows to each other 25 years ago. There are pieces of the original my dad didn't include in his abridged version, and so I've created a hybrid of the two that I'd love for Deena to use at our wedding. I've been praying over it a lot as Jon and I prepare for the next steps in our journey with Jesus.

O God of love, you have established marriage for the welfare and happiness of humankind. Yours was the plan and only with you can we work it out with joy.

Bless this husband. Bless him as provider and sustain him. May his strength be her protection, his character be her boast and her pride, and may he so live that she will find in him the honor that the heart of a woman deserves.

Bless this loving wife. Give her a tenderness that will make her great, a deep sense of understanding and a great faith in you.

Teach them that marriage is not living merely for each other; it is two uniting and joining hands to serve you. Give them a great spiritual purpose in life. May they seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and the other things shall be added unto them.

May they not expect that perfection of each other that belongs alone to you. May they minimize each other’s weaknesses, be swift to praise and magnify each other’s strengths, and see each other through a lover’s kind and patient eyes. 

Now make such assignments to them on the scroll of your will as will bless them and develop their characters as they walk together. Give them enough tears to keep them tender, enough hurts to keep them humane, enough of failure to keep their hands clenched tightly in Thine, and enough of success to make them sure they walk with God.

Now their joys are doubled since the happiness of one is the happiness of the other. Their burdens now are halved since when we share them, we divide the load.

May they never take each other’s love for granted, but always experience that breathless wonder that exclaims, ‘Out of all this world you have chosen me.’

When life is done and the sun is setting, may they be found then as now still hand in hand, still thanking God for each other. May they serve you happily, faithfully, together, until at last one lays the other in the arms of God. 

This we ask through Jesus Christ, Great Lover of Our Souls. Amen.